My Top-5 most valuable List in a life partner

I decided to write this blog considering that I am always advising friends about what to look for in a partner, both women and men. Even before I was married, I was always drawn to the topic of marriage. Despite the little roller coasters I encountered on my way to this blissful end, I was never one to be discouraged about meeting the right person. And Lord knows I have met some interesting individuals in my life! In any case, everyone has a list whether written or mentally engrained. Mine was surely written. In the vows I wrote my lovely husband, I informed him that he was definitely compared to that list. Now, there seems to be a misconception about what the list should contain. I remember looking online for what the list for a husband should contain and asking friends about their own list, one thing is for sure; they had it all wrong. 

A list for a life partner should include your values, because they guide your thoughts and behaviors, and not your needs. I will write later about how needs drive your behavior but for now here is my top-5 most important values to never overlook on your list. 

1. A man who fears God, not someone who attends church regularly, not someone who is a "prayer warrior", not the leader of the choir, and not the musician. But a man who has an intimate relationship with God. 

2. A man who sees you as an equal partner. There is nothing more disturbing than being married to a man who seeks advise from everyone else but his wife. 

3. A man who is not materialistic but selfless. Marriage is a microscope in which personality traits get  magnified. You see how you loved his over the top outfits, and how all your friends thought he could dress, right. Someway, somehow if that's all he is concerned about it can break your marriage. 

4. A man you are attracted to. Not one, you convince yourself to admire, but one you truly fond of. Not someone your friends or family think is cute, but what you view as beautifully made. 

5. Most importantly, a man YOU chose, this will make all the difference. 

Remember it is not how long your list is, but how substantial your values are. You are probably wondering what about education, money, cars, houses, looks, yes what about them? 

This is what I have learned so far in marriage, material things are the icing on the cake, not the real cake :) Don't be distracted by the gold. to be cont...